riazendira

I take it back, have a tiny bit of writing

Tue, 03 Jun 2014 18:54:04 GMT

New chapter addition to the ongoing drabble-ish "get me writing again" exercise in silliness fic: 5 Ways Tony and Tony Could Have Met.

Newest chapter here: Chapter 2: Secret Agent Man

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Long time, no see

Tue, 03 Jun 2014 15:23:52 GMT

So, um... hi? I wanted to let you all know that I have not fallen off the planet, just into an adjusted life plan that currently includes being in too many summer weddings and studying for the bar exam (something I once vowed to never do, but now am... don't ask). I just don't seem to be able to get back into the whole being online and writing thing. I have no Double Bluff for you today, writing hasn't been flowing for ages. In fact, creativity in general has pretty much been reduced for me to doodles and painting my nails in fun ways. I have not forgotten you all though. You lovelies are still the best, most encouraging, supportive group of people and I appreciate all the comments I see on Double Bluff over on AO3 asking for more. I am working on it.

Until such a time as I have more for you though, may I recommended a piece I'm helping to beta, written by a friend of mine, as a result of one too many conversations we've had on the ways in which to make Spideypool feasible? After I finish Double Bluff, I apparently owe her an "Evil Mad-Scientist Spidey" in return, but until that time, she's writing a brilliant "Spidey and Deadpool attempt to save the world while Deadpool succeeds at ogling poor Spiderman's ass" fic. It's a work in progress, but she progresses a whole lot faster than me, so I think you're safe. It can be found here: Link to "Controlling Chaos" by li_izumi. Enjoy!

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I wonder if I still remember how to post on this thing...

Wed, 24 Jul 2013 04:58:19 GMT

Hey folks - I live! And have some fic!

A new chapter has been added to "Two Cups of Coffee Short of a Full Deck" (A White Collar/Dr. Who crossover) - Find it HERE
(Just to be clear, we are "blaming" AmyCat for the existence of this chapter- though I don't know if AmyCat knows that yet).

Sorry it's not Double Bluff yet. I think that story has eaten my brain forever. I'm trying to slowly get back into things with the smaller stories and work my way up to the big one.

I don't think I'll be posting whole stories here on DW or LJ anymore. I will continue to post link updates like this one that will direct you to find the story on AO3. Sorry to make you all read around in multiple places. Feel free to leave story comments on the link posts if you don't have or want to have an AO3 account for commenting but you want to say something.

I'm also moving my way over to Tumblr at the moment. You can find me under the same username there as I have here if you want to follow me. I'll probably be posting mostly visual art (with some fan art - of course) over there. There isn't anything up there yet, just me testing out the formatting, but I'd guess there will be something worth seeing sometime in the next two to three weeks. Find my Tumblr HERE.

Hope you're all still alive and well. Please do chime in with an update if you wish to say hi. :-D

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I think I've forgotten something fundamental

Tue, 04 Jun 2013 05:13:39 GMT

Perhaps my mind?

I suspect I left it somewhere...
But of all the somewheres,
None are here.

Was it the fun in fundamental?
Was it the mental in the fun?
Was it the reason for foundation to begin with?

If not my mind, then my heart,
If not my heart, then the heart of me -
Lost I tell thee,
Is my creativity.

This foundation upon which,
I balance all my being,
Built so high and precarious,
Crashing down to re-bar frames,
Naked against a fading sky.

Take these bones and build upon them walls again...
Take these words and inspire with them movement then...
Take this moment, throw it forward into hope,

And leave behind the crumpled rubble of my old base and basis.

Learn to fly by forgetting one can hit the ground.
Learn to soar by forgetting one couldn't fly,
Learn to roar by forgetting one was once a timid speaker.
Learn to be by forgetting one ever had to forget a thing.

Forget by letting go of the ground.
Float upwards.
Remember the sky is so much bigger than you will ever be...
Why should it hold you down with trifles like gravity?

I float away wondering....
I think I've forgotten something fundamental...?

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Feeling lucky!

Wed, 03 Apr 2013 15:21:04 GMT

So, Universe, I know that I often yell at you when things are bad. Sometimes I think I fail to appreciate you when things are good. But no, then I realized, I DO appreciate you, I'm just not as mouthy about it. So, I want to take the time, Universe, dear, to say thank you. I really appreciate the good moments too. Particularly the people around me who have just been amazing these past few weeks in particular (they've been amazing before that and will continue to be I'm sure, but some very good stuff has just started happening after a long stretch of crappy, so I'd like to mention that in particular).

So let me thank you, Universe, for the good times. For the email I just got from my dad that promises me a huge weight off my shoulders and some peace of mind far sooner than I expected. For the friend who when I mentioned a difficulty this week immediately said "I can help with that." To the friend who called me exactly when she said she would (even though I ended up not being able to answer the phone) because she knows how much it means to me to know she thought of me and wanted to chat. To all the people patiently waiting for more Double Bluff and stopping by to write encouraging things. (To all those impatiently waiting who continue to do so politely and not say anything nasty- I appreciate that too, I do.) To the possible new contacts I met in the past week who are EXCITING to talk to and hopefully will become new creative partners. To the fact that I've been able to exercise to the level I want to and still walk the next day lately, that's been especially grand.

Thanks Universe, for reminding me that sometimes I get to have good luck too. Appreciate it. :-D

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An explanation and accounting of my absence from, well... everywhere:

Fri, 22 Mar 2013 04:49:52 GMT

Hi all. How goes? So I've been trying to write this entry for nigh on a month now, it just hasn't been flowing. I don't really feel like going into grand detail, but I do feel I should give you all a some explanation for why I've been AWOL from DW and LJ and Double Bluff.

It's been a really tough time for me health wise - I have a new and currently un-diagnosed health issue. The trail of attempting to diagnose it has, annoyingly, turned up other stones of health issues that while not the main issue, are issues that require taking care of. Had to go get a CT scan (That was fun! No really... really, no. Did manage to make the scan tech laugh though, so that's something.). Have a cyst on my kidney and incidentally horse shoe kidney. Neither of these things really means much, beyond apparently the need to return for another CT scan in 6 months to make sure the cyst hasn't done any new and fascinating tricks. But if they could please work out why bits of me hurt that should not hurt, I'd really appreciate it. And if someone could come up with a computer chair that doesn't make those bits hurt more, I'd REALLY appreciate it.

In addition to my health issues, I've had some online related issues with a couple of people that were the people who made going online and interacting always fun for me. Basically there have been some falling outs and going online has stopped being fun and started being a social anxiety issue that rivals attempting to go to a new bar in the middle of the city on a Saturday night by myself (which, in case I've never told you all... doesn't happen. My social anxiety is such that that feat is pretty much beyond me unless there are extenuating circumstances - like saving orphans, I might do it to save orphans.). I've been missing the people who dragged me into fandom who have since disappeared and I miss several friends I made along the way who have moved on. I know it happens, but lately it's bugged me more than usual. I miss them so much. One of them was the reason I started writing and one of them was the reason I didn't feel so alone in some of my experiences. I just miss them and somehow with my stress levels that has turned to a feeling of fear of meeting new people because I might just lose them too. Which is BS logically, but hard to pull myself out of emotionally.

So I've pretty much spent most of the last several months feeling like crap, feeling like I'll never hit "healthy" again despite all my efforts (and there have been some pretty serious efforts, sigh...) and feeling like coming out to play online was a sure fire way to end the day feeling worse than when I started. I've opened this stupid journal entry screen 20 times and just stared at it and felt brave for getting that far some days.

As for Double Bluff, I have vowed to finish it, and I have three people poking me with sharp sticks to get it done. It's pretty much the only thing that's brought me back here to do this. Even though I've got it, and the next two books, plotted out, I've been having some issue with the fact that it's gotten a tad darker than I expected it to (don't worry though, happy endings eventually) and I've been wary of writing the darker parts "wrong" because I'm not sure I'm fully up to the challenge. My goal is to post another chapter in the next week(ish), and after that I'd like to try really hard to have a chapter a week until it's done. The annoying bit is that the 2nd book is trying to write itself instead and keeps trying to cut out the in between... but I think I need the in between (I've TRIED not to... but that doesn't seem to work).

I apologize for my absence and I hope that you're all doing okay. I'm going to try and stick around more frequently in the near future, but I have to warn you all, I may eventually jump off DW and LJ entirely and just post my fic to AO3. If I do so, I will warn you in advance, I promise. At this point, I just don't know. I'm going to have to find a point that makes me comfortable and keeps the promises I've made, so there may be compromises. I do promise to you though, that even if I drop off the face of the earth completely (which would pretty much only happen if I have hospital stays to attend to... which is HIGHLY unlikely), arrangements have been made to make my story notes available to you all so that you will get to know how the story ends. So never fear, you will get the end of the tale no matter what.

My love to you all and positive hopes for the new Spring for those in a similar hemisphere to me.

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I am possibly obsessed with this song now....

Wed, 15 Aug 2012 15:53:23 GMT

And I blame this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flNzJZwSwOk

Fandom: Captain America, Song: "Carry On" by Fun., Vider: Settiai

Seriously... Fun.? I even love their band name. Well done video has once again sucked me into both new fandom and new songs. Sigh. I get all my music this way, I swear.

PS- Still alive, promise. Even wrote the start of the next chapter of Double Bluff the other day. Poking it with a probability stick to make sure it survives the plot hole test, once that is complete, expect more words.

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Reality is not my bitch... it's my tilt-a-whirl

Mon, 30 Jul 2012 18:53:07 GMT

Nothing new to tell you all except fleas suck and I hate that I've spent most of a month dealing with trying make them leave my house already! Trying to sit at my computer and type while getting bitten by fleas does not equal my definition of a good time, let me tell you.

Random fun thing note- Song of the day:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=yeEI-hh3MG0

Other than that, still trying to write, get RL in order so I can actually come back and hang around online again. Ugh. Life, so frustrating. My love to you all!

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Things I shouldn't do that I totally do anyway...

Fri, 06 Jul 2012 05:02:21 GMT

Like post to my journal after taking my sleep pill for the night... oh well, too late now.

So how have you been, lovelies? I've missed you, but been hiding from interaction for a while now. Trying to get back into the swing of it this week, and writing. It's not easy with everything else I've got going on, but worth it I think. Hope you've all been doing okay. Feel free to drop me a hello with how your life is going. Feel free to drop by with a pokey stick and demand more Double Bluff too. I need some pokey stick incentive to get that one flowing again. Anyway, I promise a bit more details later. Night all!

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Went to a speed dating event...

Sun, 22 Apr 2012 22:53:04 GMT

Managed to pick up a girl instead of any of the guys... whoops? Sorry boys, I found her first. She totally had me at "Fuck the patriarchy!" and then we pretty much ignored most of the guys all evening. Damn that was fun.

In short- Speed dating- exactly as much fun as you make it. :-D

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If you've ever struggled to write...

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 04:14:38 GMT

Then this essay right here is for you! Written by a friend of mine, it's a highly entertaining read about the struggles of writing, living and relative perspective. Give it a quick read, you won't be disappointed.

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Ooooh, I've been workin' in an offfice... all the live long days...

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 14:29:52 GMT

I've been writing silly emails... just to pass the time ah-way!

So you know those really annoying advertisements they send you via fax? The "Hey, use our travel agent and get 40% off on ALL cruises, ALL cruise lines!!!" or "Learn to SPEED READ in 3 days or less! Call now to book your class!!!" OMG ELEVENTYONE! Yeah, you know the ones I'm talking about. The ones that have a leeeetle tiny line at the bottom that says "Call here" or "Email at" to "be removed from our future mailings." So, in a gallant battle to not waste paper or ink, you call or email and then you stop getting the annoying faxes... right? Except... it doesn't always work. In this particular instance, I've emailed back and forth with the lady in charge of removing people 7 times now, and we keep getting more of the same exact fax. She's starting to get just as annoyed by it as I am.

So, this morning, when I came in to find yet another fax from them, I ended up writing (but alas, not sending, due to the fact that I'm not representing myself, so much as my company) the email below to her. As it will never be sent to her, I figured I'd share it with you all in the hopes that it might make you smile.

Dear M,

I write, with great regrets, to inform you that we have received yet ANOTHER fax this morning. And though, I truly appreciate our correspondence (verily it is a highlight of my otherwise busy mornings!), I would wish to end the basis for it immediately. Which is to say, really, this needs to stop. I would not speak ill of anyone without having (at the very least!) met them first, but whomever is in charge of updating the fax sending list at your main office appears to be quite content to simply not execute his or her job.

Perhaps it is time to go beyond the route of established protocol and begin some alternative method of communication to finally get the message across- smoke signals perhaps? Singing telegram? Frosted cake message? (Though it phases me somewhat to think of the baker's face when asked for a cake that said "STOP SENDING ME EXTRANEOUS FACSIMILES IMMEDIATELY!) Mayhaps we can do something creative with disappearing ink and neon paper instead? Any suggestions you might have on this matter would be greatly appreciated and promptly acted on.

Again, I appreciate all of your efforts to rectify this situation. You will not, I hope, take offense when I say, I shall appreciate them even more when the situation is actually rectified. With great hopes that I will not be forced to add you to my holiday card list simply because I correspond more with you then I do with my own mother, and many thanks for your continuing efforts, I am,

Sincerely,

Ria

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FIC: Fifty-two Card Pick Up (Sequel to Two Cups of Coffee Short of a Full Deck)

Sat, 14 Apr 2012 19:22:54 GMT

General update - Still working on more Double Bluff, promise. But until I can get that posted, have some other fic...

Another pressie fic/snippet. This one's for Amycat who's prompt was "All things considered, it was a surprisingly GOOD holiday..." and since Amycat asked for more of this fic (DW/LJ links here) when it first came out and then asked for crossovers with her prompt... um, two birds, one time travel fic? I know it's not exactly what you were after with your prompt, darling, but I hope it still works for you.

Fifty-two Card Pick Up
(Also available on AO3)
(White Collar/Dr Who - please note, first one was gen, this one is not- though it probably still only rates a PG for kissin')
Beta credit to Monica, handholding/brainstorming/etc credit to alee_grrl, thank you lovelies!

( Click for Fic )

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Proof I still exist

Wed, 04 Apr 2012 01:32:00 GMT

Much love to you all! Sorry to have been so scarce, it's been a rough however long it's been. Work, health, moving, death in the family... RL has eaten all my online time. Rest assured I do read my flist still, I just tend to only get to do so while on the metro, from my phone, which doesn't make for a whole lot of posting or responding. I'm working on it. I'm also working on more Double Bluff and outstanding pressies. One day, I will catch up to this to do list... until then, enjoy a quick drive by song of the day:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFhgupR565Q

Felicia Day... when you are not awesome?

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Double Bluff: Chapter 18

Tue, 06 Mar 2012 17:40:32 GMT

So, after months (months!) of tearing my hair out on where Double Bluff was going next (well okay, I know where it's going, it's just the getting it there that's an issue), I give you Chapter 18. The most difficult one to drag out into existence to-date. I'm not sure it's worth all the build up, but hopefully you all enjoy it nonetheless. Let's raise a glass to chapter 19 being less recalcitrant, shall we?

On this chapter, many thanks to Monica for beta, cheerleading/poking with a sharp stick for forward action, alee_grrl for first reading/beta and plot brainstorming sessions, Gemma for poking with a sharp stick for forward action, and Pinch Hitter for beta and putting up with my endless conversations on this as always. Couldn't do this without you, lovelies!

*Note- The title of this section really isn't as scary as it might seem. It's more metaphorical than literal.

<----Chapter 17 here(or here on LJ)

( Chapter 18: When the World Ends )

Chapter 19 (and here on LJ) ---->

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Fly by update~!

Wed, 15 Feb 2012 19:36:35 GMT

Hello lovelies! So to summarize where I've been and why it hasn't been here since... oh, the beginning of the new year?

Saga the first:
New year's day, the cat got out for a little over a day. He came back, sigh of relief. Two weeks later he suddenly developed a huge abscess on his cheek. Brought him to the emergency vet, they drained it gave me antibiotics and told me to bring him to his regular vet in three days for follow up. At the follow up, the vet's receptionist panicked at the correlation between cat getting out and abscess developing shortly thereafter and decided this had to be reported to animal control as a possible unknown origin bite/scratch possible rabies issue. (Oh my!) She calls animal control, then kitty sees the vet. Vet says "!2 days after? That doesn't seem highly likely. Does your cat skirmish with the other cat in the house?" (Um, YES.) "Seems more likely he got it from that and we can give him a booster shot and it will be fine."

Animal control tells me to quarantine my kitty for 6 months- but then takes it back after talking to the vet (So glad, because, duuuude, that would have been annoying). All seems right with the world again, crisis averted. Week or so later... kitty develops abscess near his shoulder (roughly where the vet gave him the vaccine we think). Dammit. Another trip to the vet (and another $150 later... I'm down over $500 to this kitty adventure mind you) kitty is given another antibiotic... oddly enough by shot (which didn't seem recommended to me, but I'm not the vet I guess- perhaps it was stronger than by pill?). Now that we're finally a few weeks after that, kitty seems okay. (*fingers crossed, knock on wood repeatedly*) Which brings us to...

Saga the second:
MOVING!!!!! (There are not enough exclamation points in the world) I have been trying to get out of my current living situation for a while now, but have been unable to afford it with medical bills etc (I'm still not really able to, but I won't be starving, I'll just be cinching in the ol' belt... I hope). I have finally found a place to move to (with a fun and interesting- but not scary- roommate) that I can enjoy living. I'm moving back to the area of town I really like, I'll have such lovely amenities as a hardwood floor, actual light (second story instead of my current basement level), walking distance (real walking distance, not omg I ADORE walking long distances "walking distance") to the metro, downtown, and my gym (pool!!!), and a lovely kitchen suitable for entertaining. I'm really quite looking forward to only having one roommate too. And looking forward to moving in at the same time as my roommate, so we can make house rules together, rather than having house rules foist upon me. All of this is great. But it does mean I'm spending the week packing, the weekend physically moving, and then the week after unpacking.

So... you will all probably hear from me again in about March. Sorry darlings! I miss you too. And let it be known, I have been working on Double Bluff and all the various pressies (I have not forgotten, just delayed) and once again, I welcome all whip cracking, begging, demanding, or general commentary on how I need to give you all more writing. It's cool, I appreciate the reminder that you're all there waiting to read new stuff and it often does spur me to better focus and output.

I hope you're all doing well! I haven't been on lj reading my friends page much at all in the past 3 weeks or so, so if you've had big news you want me to know, please please tell me! I just haven't got it in me time management wise to read back and sort through all comms/personal journals to get just the good stuff. Link me your post though, and I promise to read.

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I still exist! And I bring fic!

Fri, 03 Feb 2012 02:51:06 GMT

Hello darlings! I have much to catch you all up on, but for now, I have more important things to do. Suffice it to say, life happened, but I did promise you all fic, so I will begin to deliver now that life is not happening so overwhelmingly.

Without further delay (because by golly, if there's anything I've had enough of, it is delay), I give you present fic #1, the sequel to Not Tony's Fault. This one's for Monica (with the lovely Pinch Hitter as beta, because asking Monica to beta her own fic would spoil the surprise) who said she wouldn't mind more kidfic like the first- so here you are, another 6 or so years down the line in the same AU. Hope you like it!

( Probably Abby's Fault )

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It occurs to me...

Sun, 15 Jan 2012 05:36:05 GMT

To be belatedly both amused and annoyed at the Universe for seeing fit to make my black cat sick on Friday the 13th.

Aren't two unlucky's supposed to make a lucky? Le sigh.

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I bet you're all wondering...

Sat, 14 Jan 2012 06:17:18 GMT

Where the heck I've been. Yeah. Well. See... it's like this. First I I lost the cat, a then I had a cold, and now, now the cat is sick. I'm beginning to think he just doesn't like it when I get an unexpected three day weekend, since he seems to save these traumatic moments for them. Or perhaps it's once again time for me to rail against the universe. Who knows. Long story short- I went to work, cat was fine. I returned from work, cat looked like he'd tried to swallow a ping pong ball and instead got it stuck in his cheek all chipmunk like. Abscess. Sigh. So tomorrow we get to play the ever riveting game "Find a vet that's open on Saturday". Joy.

Plus, this is me, and this cat is my baby. I mean, I was there when he was born, and I've pretty much been trying to keep him from killing himself accidentally ever since (no really, I have - he's fallen from the 2nd story to the 1st, stuck his head down a sink disposal, decided to try and make friends with the a pit bull AND a Lab/Mastiff cross at once... the list goes on. I swear this kitty has the fewest self protective instincts of any cat I've ever had or met). Point is, I don't really do calm on this one. I swear I'm more worried about the cat then I was about my own cancer surgery.

I promise I haven't forgotten about you guys, or about the fic I promised. I just need to get this whole thing sorted, get over the resulting anxiety attack, and I will be back in working order in no time. And I've still got Monday off, so maybe that will help.

Around 3 pm today, I was pretty sure I had it all too. I finished EVERYTHING on my desk, nothing left waiting for me next week- for the first time in ages! I was just elated, I love that feeling of "Done!" where you can totally put work to rest and focus on other things. Then I came home and went to pet the cat. I suppose that was my first mistake. Note to self, next time, wait until you've successfully gotten home and disarmed the cat before feeling fully accomplished for the day...

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Kitty returned! (at 6:30 AM, sorry, had to go to work)

Wed, 04 Jan 2012 00:41:10 GMT

The silly wayward one apparently had enough of the freezing (literally) cold outside and ran up to the porch door this morning. My dear friend Gemma heard him scratching and tried to coax him inside. He chirped back at her, but remained hidden, so she ran to my room and woke me up. I tore upstairs and outside (in my bathrobe) and called to him. After a few minutes of consideration (and me shaking his treat bag) he poked his head out from under the deck. Then he basically came right to me and I grabbed him up like the frantic worried thing I was.

Because I had to go to work, Gemma stayed with the kitty all day. And sent me amusing photos via email so that I'd know he was still safe and sound. He spent much of the day cuddling and sleeping (hey, the outside is a tough, energy sapping world) and then gave me a nice hug upon my return. (if you'd like to hear a longer version of the story from Gemma's perspective, jump right over here and say hi- be welcoming now, she's new, and she saved my kitty from almost certain frozen toes.)

( Allow me to share some highlights with you )

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Slight delay on that pressie order...

Tue, 03 Jan 2012 01:56:42 GMT

Sorry folks, I won't be posting pressies as planned at the moment. My cat somehow managed to get himself outside last night and we haven't been able to find him since. He's been an indoor cat all his life, and only gotten outside for perhaps an hour on two previous occasions, so I'm a bit worried. Okay, a lot worried. Writing and drawing are very much not at the top of my priorities at the moment. Anyone on my end of the DC area, do me a favor and be on the look out for a 16lbs black (with tiny white smudges on the chest and tummy), male, short-haired cat who clearly has no sense of self preservation and should totally come home before I start panicking, kay? Thanks.

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Happy (soon to be) New Years, Lovelies!

Sat, 31 Dec 2011 05:36:07 GMT

I'll be out all tomorrow, so I'd like to take the opportunity to wish you all a lovely New Year celebration and a kick ass new year! As my brother said to me last year, so I wish it be again for you all: May this year kick the ass of the last!

This year has been one of bummers and triumphs for me personally. I've had (and gotten rid of) cancer, gotten a new (much better) job, made my first successful wedding dress (and become better friends with the lovely lady who was the bride in the process, which is frankly more important than the dress), written a whole bunch more words than last year (or many years actually, it's been a good writing year for me, let us hope it heralds what's to come), and met many of you (or continued to get to know you better). All things considered, this was a pretty damn fine year. I'm terribly excited for the year to come!

To kick off the new year right, as per this post I'll be delivering the presents starting the first of the year. I'm going to try for one present a day posted here. Some days it will be fic, some days art, and some days (once I've gotten to the post office) I'll post photos of what I've sent out to people. If you never asked for a pressie, it's not too late! Drop me a comment on that post and I will put you on the list. I'm going to start on a random present and just keep posting until I've gotten everyone.

My love to you all! Wishing you a happy and healthy, glorious new year!

PS- What is this hoopla that i keep hearing about LJ breaking things again? Things we need... like comments? IDK, I was gone for a week and stuff happened. I've been cross posting from DW for months, is there something I need to fix on my LJ now? Way to build confidence for the new year, LJ. *loves me some DW*

PPS- Way to go Vermont! An impressive feat just in time for the new year!

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A little help real quick, please?

Sat, 17 Dec 2011 19:08:16 GMT

Okay, so if you needed to buy a printed T shirt, where would you get it? Like say, Cafepress, Threadless, etc? Basically, I need a comprehensive list of shops/sites that do wholesale T shirt printing. Any and all places desired. I've done some googling, but it doesn't appear to be an exhaustive list, so I'd love to know if any of you lovelies has ideas.

PS- I kind of need this ASAP, so obi won flist, you're my only hope!

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Oh Hai Internetz, I made you a cookie but I eated it*

Sat, 17 Dec 2011 18:07:56 GMT

Though never fear! The recipe is right here! For all those times I promise virtual cookies and you wanted actual cookies, allow me to give you one of the best cookie recipes on the planet.

( Ex-boyfriend cookies (or Mocha Cinnamon Chocolate Chip Cookies) )

* Explaination of title reference for those who may not know it can be found HERE, and HERE

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Oh screw this! Who wants presents???

Wed, 14 Dec 2011 03:14:54 GMT

I'm not bitter. Nope.

Fuck. It's clearly time for my regularly scheduled holiday related break down and reboot... sooo:

Okay, confession time. So I kind of hate the holidays, okay? I love the idea of them. Shiny happy people and all that. The actual reality of them though... I think it's telling that my favorite holiday related movie moment is the toy battle montage in Toys. (Link to song, other favorite song, happy people song just because- sadly you will have to watch the movie for the actual scene, 'cause I can't find in on youtube) I love the holidays in fandom because hey, sudden abundance of sappy happy holiday fic can't be beat as a way to avoid the actual reality of dealing with RL holidays, ya?

My reality is traveling (which I can't afford) to places I don't want to be to sleep on beds I don't actually sleep on (even with sleeping pills) to get attacked (happily only verbally) by people that (only a few of whom I actually like) about how my life is not yet made of roses and candy and husbands and kids and when will I GET RIGHT ON THAT? To which I can only say - Dude, STILL can't fix YOUR life by living my own, so back the fuck off, mmm kay?

My current fucking fabulous mood is brought on by the fact that virtually everyone I know is coupled up happily this year (with a few exceptions WHO KEEP NOT RETURNING MY PHONE CALLS/EMAILS-[you four feel free to self identify, because you know who you are] so whatever, hope you're still all alive, geez). So all my options for "Oh hey, I'd like to talk to someone else in my situation when I'm feeling a bit down tonight" turned up voice mail (and are a LOT lately). I'm not saying it's not tough for everyone... but seriously that's why we band TOGETHER people. Then they can't take us out from behind.

All that being said, given my resolution last year to stay positive this year (something I've done rather well so far even in the face of some annoying shit- cancer's more annoying than holidays, right? So dude, bring it) and my current less than sparklie mood, yet my love and adoration for the celebration of all winter holidays I was raised with (Um, Christmas, Hanukkah and Solstice if you're really wondering... why yes, I do have an interesting family, why do you ask?) I hereby propose a happy making thing- 'cause everybody's got one right?

Important part -Here's what you do:

1) If you would like a thing, an actually factual physical thing you can hold in your hand, (like say a postcard, or possibly a pair of earrings, something), PM or email me with your address and at the very least a color you like for earrings, or a show you like for a sketch, or just yah know, a word you like even- something to give me a starting point in sending you a surprise thing.

2) If you would like to get a virtual something (without giving out your address), just drop me a comment here with a choice of fandom (Dr. Who, H5O, White Collar, Stargate, NCIS, or Due South) and favorite pairing and a quick prompt (photos, words, a few sentences, or questions all count as prompts- no actual whole plot outlines, though okay? Let's leave me a teeny bit o sanity to confront my family with) [On this one you can just pick any one of these things too if you're not picky, you don't HAVE to pick fandom, pairing and prompt]

3) If you have a friend that you know really needs cheering up come holiday time, sign them up for either one too (don't give me their address without their permission obviously, give me yours and you can forward it). Spread the random giftiness!

Optional 4) Feel free to vent about your holiday woes here, I will totally commiserate and offer up hugs, cookies and supportive snarky commentary. Best fabulously terrible outrageous holiday story wins a bonus prize! (Like say- I totally had one year my car exploded [billowing white smoke, total engine failure] on the Turnpike while driving to VT from DC, I had to spend the night in a hotel and then when I got there BOTH Christmas trees [in two totally different houses!] FELL ON ME when I wasn't even touching them.)

I'll keep doing this until I have no more budget to send things, or no more energy to write/sketch, so seriously, please allow me to send or make you a happy holiday gifty thing. I've done this before and gotten like 3 people who signed up- I'm giving away GIFTS here people, take one already or I'll go all grumpy Scrooge on you, I swear I will. You wouldn't want my usual upbeat personality to go all bitter now would you? :-D

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